A low point

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Keep smiling!

My heart pounds writing this…

After refilling my pump on Saturday morning, the thought of taking the entire contents went through my head. But it stopped at that…a thought….the thought of my folks.

I’m not one for feeling such extremes like this, but a mix of emotions and stress have made for a difficult time recently.

I didn’t feel tearful or upset even, just hurt inside and very very black is the only way to describe it.

Being a ‘glass half empty’ kinda thinker, doesn’t really help these things.

So, what do you do?….

Go with it and carry on….That day, I went out and stayed out all day, it was the right thing for me.

We all cope with things in different ways.
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A slick of eyeliner and lashings of mascara is only a superficial fix, but it always makes me feel good. Ok, make-up doesn’t take away any of the feelings but it certainly makes me look and feel better! Along with painting my nails of course! It doesn’t matter, what ever works!

Talking to some of you, chatting sense, nonsense and making me smile, really kept me going and I can’t thank you enough xx

As did walking and feeling the sunshine on my skin, a cakey treat and a glass of wine, these all helped things feel a little less gloomy.

What about the impact on my diabetes?…Amazingly my pump kept my bg’s between 5 and 9 that day!

Today I feel fluffier and brighter!

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2 thoughts on “A low point

  1. I recently experienced that dark emptieness, i gave in though and pumped what I could into myself a recent Sunday night. Went to bed on a few glasses of whisky. I woke up I have no idea why it didnt kill me.
    A worried friend phoned me after seeing my facebook posts talked some sense and hope into me so I`m now waiting on seeing a diabetes psycholigist.
    I cant wear makeup but I have tried sparkly nail varnish for a day πŸ™‚
    Hope things are much brighter for you these days fluffy

    • I’m really sorry to hear that, but I’m so glad the worst did not happen and that I’m sitting here reading your words. That’s a great friend you have! Excellent plan to speak to someone. I found talking to a counsellor a real help. Also, social media has been a great help, being able to talk to other people with diabetes has been fantastic. Especially at low times, because a PWD just gets it and understands everything about what it’s like to have diabetes…how frustrating it can be, sometimes I just want to throw my monkey out the pram when it (my D) won’t play ball, but many a time has a PWD made me smile with mutual understanding having also been there too. Its helped me to not feel so alone in my fluffy world, which is feeling brighter thank you 😊 I hope you get all the help and support you need.

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